He's always been our carefree, wild, energetic little boy who was totally oblivious to the world around him. Some parents would complain about that and I understand to a point. But he always amazed me with how innocent his mind was. He had NO idea that anything could ever go wrong. No fears, no worries, no regrets. Just play, eat, sleep, repeat....
Now, I see that changing. He seems to care more about other people's feelings, worries more and he acts more mature than he did even just a few weeks ago. His heart is changing and he is more aware of the things around him. While I know thats a good thing in some ways....it also makes me sad because he is discovering that bad things DO happen, and that people get angry and do hurtful things, and maybe to be honest - I wanted him to stay clueless about those things. He asks me often if we still love him and I continually tell him that nothing he could do would change that. He never thought of those things before and it breaks my heart that he would worry about such things.
I know that turning 5 means going to school soon, and then he will learn even more about the real world. Why can't they just stay young...innocent...sweet? This song pretty much sums it up for me:
"To you everything's funny.....you got nothing to regret....I'd give all I have honey....if you could stay like that"
So tonight I sang that song to him while we were rocking and he said with the sweetest little crackling voice "I'm sorry Mom, I have to grow up - So I can be a good big person like you and daddy".
Happy birthday little man, you melt Mommy's heart!!
awwwww! I can completely understand that. My kids have kept their innocence much longer than most too and to realize how much they have learned already breaks my heart. I treasured it as long as I could.
ReplyDeleteHe sounds so sweet. Wish I could meet your family.